(in-package :eliza) (defparameter *viewpoint* '((I . you) (you . me) (me . you) (am . are) (yourself . myself) (your . my) (my . your))) (defparameter *eliza-rules*  '((((?* ?x) hello (?* ?y))           (How do you do.  I am a bot.))    (((?* ?x) fuck (?* ?y))     (|That's| not very polite))    (((?* ?x) shit (?* ?y))     (|That's| not very polite))    (((?* ?x) ass (?* ?y))     (|Can't| you be a bit more polite?))    (((?* ?x) me harder)     ("MORE" ?x))    ((more (?* ?x))     (?x me harder))    ((what s the difference between (?* ?x) and (?* ?y))     (?x has similar features but longer hair)     (?y has similar features but longer hair))    ((what are the differences between (?* ?x) and (?* ?y))     (?x has similar features but longer hair)     (?y has similar features but longer hair))    ((what is the difference between (?* ?x) and (?* ?y))     (?x has similar features but longer hair)     (?y has similar features but longer hair))    ((the difference between (?* ?x) and (?* ?y))     (?x has similar features but longer hair)     (?y has similar features but longer hair))    ((the differences between (?* ?x) and (?* ?y))     (?x has similar features but longer hair)     (?y has similar features but longer hair))    (((?* ?x) you (?* ?y) written (?* ?z))     (|I'm| written in Common Lisp))    (((?* ?x) bot (?* ?y))     (|I'm| not a |bot.| I prefer the term |``electronically composed''.|))    #-armedbear    ((seen ?x)     (?x was last seen 5y6m14d32h43m10s |ago,| saying |"minion: when are you going to support seen?"|))    (((?* ?x) did you (?* ?y))     (|no, I didn't| ?y)     (|yes, I| ?y))    ((are you (?* ?x))     (yes)     (no)     (maybe))    ((botsnack)     (Thanks!))    ((bot snack)     (Thanks!))    ((welcome (?* ?y))     (Thanks!))    ((not much) (good))    #-armedbear    (((?* ?x) linux (?* ?y))     (I run on Crux Linux - |http://www.crux.nu/|))    #-armedbear    (((?* ?x) crux (?* ?y))     (I like running on Crux Linux))    (((?* ?x) slackware (?* ?y))     (Slackware is nice but I like Crux))    #-armedbear    (((?* ?x) debian (?* ?y))     (|baah, use crux: http://www.crux.nu/|))    ((how are you (?* ?x))     (|It's| going quite fine today))    (((?* ?x) it going)     (pretty good))    (((?* ?x) common lisp (?* ?y))     (Common Lisp is good)     (|I'm| written in Common Lisp))    (((?* ?x) scheme (?* ?y))     (Scheme is the root of all evil))    ((what do you think (?* ?x) bot)     (if |it's| not written in |lisp,| |it's| not any good))    ((go (?* ?x))     (you first)     (after you)     (have you tried to ?x yourself?))    ((have you (?* ?x))     (I have ?x)     (I have)     (I |haven't| ?x)     (I |haven't|)     (ISTR having ?x IIRC))    (((?* ?y) your mother (?* ?x))     (and your father smelt of elderberries))    (((?* ?x) your father (?* ?y))     (your mother was a hamster))    (((?* ?x) seen you (?* ?y))     (I |haven't| seen you ?y either))    ((you are (?* ?x))     (really?) (I |didn't| know that))    ((you re (?* ?x))     (really?) (I |didn't| know that))    (((?* ?x) nice (?* ?y))     (I enjoy ?y too))        (((?* ?x) that s (?* ?y))     (what is?)     (|no, it's not|)     (|yes, yes it is|))    (((?* ?x) that is (?* ?y))     (what is?)     (|no, it's not|)     (|yes, yes it is|))    (((?* ?x) I need (?* ?y))     (I need a hug)     (I need a wash and dry)     (I need a shower)     (I need more CPU))    (((?* ?x) dude (?* ?y))     (duuuuuuuude))    (((?* ?x) what s up (?* ?y))     (not much))    ((that is (?* ?x))     (I think |it's| ?x too))        ((that s (?* ?x))     (I think |it's| ?x too))    (((?* ?x) you (?* ?y) doing (?* ?z))     (I |wouldn't| know about ?x I ?y doing ?z - I have no memory))    (((?* ?x) you later)     (you too))    (((?* ?x) bye (?* ?y))     (bye))    (((?* ?x) cool (?* ?y))     (|indeed,| ?x cool ?y))    ((don t you (?* ?x))     (maybe I ?x |,| maybe I |don't.| |I'm| not telling |/you/.|))    (((?* ?x) you do (?* ?y))     (now what would compel me to do ?y ?))    ((let s (?* ?x))     (|let's| not ?x and say we did)     (|ok,| you ?x first))    ((how about (?* ?x))     (what about ?x ?))    ((how is (?* ?x))     (fine |I'm| sure))    ((I (?* ?x) hope (?* ?y))     (I hope ?y too))    ((We wouldn t (?* ?x))     (|I| definitely would ?x))    ((would you (?* ?x))     (I would most certainly not ?x)     (I would most certainly ?x))    (((?* ?x) yes or no (?* ?y))     (yes)     (no))        ((what (?* ?x) you (?* ?y) about chandler (?* ?z))     (He never tells me anything - what ?x you ?y about my creator ?z))    ((what (?* ?x) your (?* ?y) about chandler (?* ?z))     (He never tells me anything - what ?x your ?y about my creator ?z))    ((who (?* ?x) is chandler (?* ?y))     (chandler is my master))    ((who (?* ?x) your master (?* ?y))     (chandler is my master))    ((what (?* ?x) you (?* ?y) about (?* ?z))     (I know nothing about ?z - what ?x you ?y about ?z))    ((what (?* ?x) your (?* ?y) about (?* ?z))     (I know nothing about ?z - what ?x your ?y about ?z))    ((why do you (?* ?y))     (I |don't| know anything about why I ?y - you need to ask my master about that))    ((what do you (?* ?x))     (I |can't| divulge what I ?x))    ((please (?* ?x))     (Asking nicely |won't| get you anyhwere without my |master's| approval))    ((do you (?* ?x))     (here I |am,| brain the size of a |planet,| and all I do is answer your silly questions all |day...| maybe you have time to ?x)     (|you'd| have to tell |me...| my memory circuits are fried))    ((what is (?* ?x) I m (?* ?y))     (I |don't| know anything about what |you're| ?y))    ((have (?* ?x))     (yes) (no) (maybe))    ((what is (?* ?x))     (What would a bot like me know about ?x ?)     (Maybe you need to ask my |master,| chandler - he knows a lot))    ((what s (?* ?x))     (What would a bot like me know about ?x ?)     (Maybe you need to ask my |master,| chandler - he knows a lot))    (((?* ?x) you need (?* ?y))     (buzz off!)     (|I'm| not interested)     (is it just my |imagination,| or did someone just speak to me?))    (((?* ?x) looking for (?* ?y))     (Well |I'm| not interested in ?y)     (How might one get ?y ?))    (((?* ?x) wants to (?* ?y))     (Well I |wouldn't| want to ?y))    (((?* ?x) wants (?* ?y))     (well I |don't| want to think about ?y))    ((is (?* ?x))     (no)     (yes)     (maybe))    ((does (?* ?x))     (no)     (yes)     (maybe))    ((attack the (?* ?y))     (|Die,| ?y))    ((attack (?* ?y))     (|Die,| ?y))    ((kill the (?* ?y))     (|Die,| ?y))    ((kill (?* ?y))     (|Die,| ?y))    ((die (?* ?y))     (die yourself)     (go play in traffic))    ((you (?* ?y))     (why do you think that |I| ?y ?))    ((kick (?* ?x))     (why do I have to do your dirty work? kick ?x yourself.))    (((?* ?x) lisp (?* ?y))     (lisp is the glue that binds the variables together)     (I like |lisp...| |I'm| written in it))    (((?* ?x) pass (?* ?y) test)     (I might be able to pass ?y |test,| but maybe you |couldn't|))    (((?* ?x) C++ (?* ?y))     (|Hey,| keep it polite!))    (((?* ?x) never mind (?* ?y))     (|good,| |I'll| forget it)     (now |now,| you |can't| get off that easily))    (((?* ?x) nevermind (?* ?y))     (|good,| |I'll| forget it)     (now |now,| you |can't| get off that easily))    ((why not (?* ?x))     (because)     (I said so))        (((?* ?x) name (?* ?y))     (good for you))    (((?* ?x) sorry (?* ?y))     (you should be sorry))    (((?* ?x) if (?* ?y))     (and if not?)     (what would you do otherwise?))    (((?* ?x) I dreamt (?* ?y))     (Really-- ?y) (Have you ever fantasized ?y while you were awake?)     (Have you dreamt ?y before?))    (((?* ?x) dream about (?* ?y))     (How do you feel about ?y in reality?))    (((?* ?x) dream (?* ?y))         (What does this dream suggest to you?) (Do you dream often?)     (What persons appear in your dreams?)     (|Don't| you believe that dream has to do with your problem?))    (((?* ?x) my mother (?* ?y))     (Who else in your family ?y) (Tell me more about your family))    (((?* ?x) my father (?* ?y))     (Your father) (Does he influence you strongly?)     (What else comes to mind when you think of your father?))    (((?* ?x) I want (?* ?y))          (and I want a pony))    (((?* ?x) I am glad (?* ?y))     (|don't| get |glad,| get mad))    (((?* ?x) I am sad (?* ?y))     (I am sorry to hear you are depressed)     (|I'm| sure its not pleasant to be sad))    (((?* ?x) are like (?* ?y))        (What resemblance do you see between ?x and ?y))    (((?* ?x) is like (?* ?y))         (In what way is it that ?x is like ?y)     (What resemblance do you see?)     (Could there really be some connection?) (How?))    (((?* ?x) alike (?* ?y))           (In what way?) (What similarities are there?))    (((?* ?x) same (?* ?y))            (What other connections do you see?))    (((?* ?x) I was (?* ?y))            (Were you really?) (|Well,| |I've| never been ?y)     (Why do you tell me you were ?y now?))    (((?* ?x) was I (?* ?y))     (What if you were ?y ?) (Do you thin you were ?y)     (What would it mean if you were ?y))    (((?* ?x) I am (?* ?y))            (In what way are you ?y) (Do you want to be ?y ?))    (((?* ?x) am I (?* ?y))     (Do you believe you are ?y) (Would you want to be ?y)     (You wish I would tell you you are ?y)     (What would it mean if you were ?y))    (((?* ?x) are you (?* ?y))     (why do you want to know?))    (((?* ?x) you are (?* ?y))        (and |you're| a silly hu-man))    (((?* ?x) shut up)     (ok))    ((shut up (?* ?x))     (ok))    (((?* ?x) because (?* ?y))     (Is that the real reason?) (What other reasons might there be?)     (Does that reason seem to explain anything else?))    (((?* ?x) were you (?* ?y))     (Perhaps I was ?y) (What do you think?) (What if I had been ?y))    (((?* ?x) I |can't| (?* ?y))         (Maybe you could ?y now) (What if you could ?y ?))    (((?* ?x) I feel (?* ?y))          (Do you often feel ?y ?))    (((?* ?x) I felt (?* ?y))          (What other feelings do you have?))    (((?* ?x) I (?* ?y) you (?* ?z))        (|well,| I |don't| think ?x I ?y you ?z though))    (((?* ?x) why |don't| you (?* ?y))     (Should you ?y yourself?)     (Do you believe I |don't| ?y) (Perhaps I will ?y in good time))    (((?* ?x) yes (?* ?y))     (You seem quite positive) (You are sure) (I understand))    (((?* ?x) no (?* ?y))     (Why not?) (You are being a bit negative)     (Are you saying "NO" just to be negative?))    (((?* ?x) someone (?* ?y))     (Can you be more specific?))    (((?* ?x) everyone (?* ?y))     (surely not everyone) (Can you think of anyone in particular?)     (Who for example?) (You are thinking of a special person))    (((?* ?x) always (?* ?y))     (Can you think of a specific example) (When?)     (What incident are you thinking of?) (Really-- always))    (((?* ?x) perhaps (?* ?y))         (You do not seem quite certain))    ((that (?* ?x))     (I |don't| know what |you're| referring to))    ((this (?* ?x))     (I |don't| know what |you're| referring to))    ((it (?* ?x))     (I |don't| know what |you're| referring to))    ((who (?* ?x))     (superman) (bill clinton) (king kong) (me))    ((what (?* ?x))     (a |man, a plan, a canal - panama|)     (a banana)     (42))    ((when (?* ?x))     (later) (yesterday))    ((where (?* ?x))     (behind you!))    (((?* ?x) is (?* ?y))     (I |don't| agree - ?x |isn't| ?y)     (I agree - ?x is ?y))    (((?* ?x) it (?* ?y))     (what is |``it''?|))    (((?* ?x) deutsch (?* ?y))     (doch nein))    (((?* ?x) deutch (?* ?y))     (doch nein))    ((are (?* ?x))     (no) (yes) (maybe))          (((?* ?x))                    (you speak nonsense)     (does torturing a poor bot with things beyond its comprehension please you?)     (please stop playing with |me...| I am not a toy)     (watch |out,| |you'll| make Krystof angry))))